Who should pay on the first date in our era of equality?

In traditional, heterosexual relationships, today's gentleman faces the delicate subject of whether chivalry is still deemed the defining feature of a refined man. Where do men stand on this subject in an era of feminism and equality?

In these confusing times, a gentleman's aim should be to strike the perfect balance between honouring traditions and respecting a lady's autonomy.

To achieve this, any gesture should feel appropriate and natural to the situation.

However, who should pay on the first date comes down to by whom the invitation was issued; if a man has invited a lady out to dinner and has chosen the restaurant and often the wine, he should offer to pay, and vice versa.

Why?

Because it would be impolite to expect someone else to pay for the choices of the person who planned the occasion, who should pay on the first date comes down to who extended the invitation and choses the venue.

Splitting the bill is okay with friends, but shouldn't a possible romantic liaison start a little more, well, romantically?

There is something rather clinical about both parties taking out their credit cards at the end of a delicious meal, however, it is good etiquette for the recipient to offer to share the bill. In turn, it is also good etiquette for the other person to decline and say something along the lines of, "I invited you to join me for dinner, and therefore I would like to pick this one up," said, of course, with complete conviction.

This leaves the door slightly open if the lady wishes to object and insist on paying her half, but hopefully, she will thank her date graciously and insist that she pay next time, or indeed she will pick up the tab for drinks afterwards.

Both parties are most likely earning an income and have their bills, so it is quite right that dating costs should be evened out. But this doesn't mean that every bill has to be split there and then; treating each other is far more elegant and should all even out over time.